potty humor

This falls under the category "tour de grandmothers" but I just couldn't resist titling my post "potty humor."

Ever since I got to Texas, my hiney hasn't known what to do. At my granny #1's house, the toilets are all elevated, which is nice, but for a hiney that isn't well-educated, it doesn't know what to do. It feels like it might be peeing on the lid at some times and then when it travels to granny #2's house, it feels like it's sitting on the floor with a regular height toilet. Then, when it goes back to granny #1, it plays the mind games again. What's a hiney to do?

Then, add in the fact that granny #1 has broken the toilet seats so often that my uncle got her a heavy-duty toilet seat, and the potty humor is in full force. Take a look at this bad boy!

See the wingspan and contour on that thing?
tThe rim measures at least 7" and if I thought I could have gotten a ruler into the bathroom on this covert operation to photograph the potty, I would have just to prove it.


And, last but not least, I have to mention the carpet in the bathroom. Who puts carpet in the bathroom? My grandmother. The good thing about this house is that the last house had blue carpet.

The more I learn about getting older....I guess I shouldn't finish this sentence.

tour de grandmothers part 1

When my mom and I landed in Houston, the welcoming committee was there to pick us up. Grandma, Uncle Steve, Aunt Kathy, Brandi (my cousin), and Piper (her daughter). Let's just say it was a good thing we only had carry-on luggage.

Piper was her usual talkative self and we chatted the whole way back to West Columbia (an hour's drive) about Bolt, school, Marley & Me, and braiding hair. Fun stuff.



When we got to Kathy and Steve's new house, I got the guided tour. The house has lots of limestone, which is so beautiful, but is horrible for wireless internet, if you want to know. Luckily, though, they have wireless, so that's where I plan to be on sneak night (Tuesday) for Studio Calico.

On the house tour, I saw lots of interesting things. One was a portrait/painting of my dad that they had found in Grandma's attic when they were moving. He had it done in New Orleans many years ago and it's just so cute. Can't wait to show you!

Another interesting item was Grandma's toilet seat. Talk about a throne! I was going to try to sneak a photo of it today, but it was......well....it was pungent when I passed by her room. Maybe I'll have better luck later.

Today, Kathy got up and cooked a big breakfast on her 48" cooktop. Sausage, bacon, eggs, new potatoes, toast...she can fit a lot on that griddle! I'm so happy we decided to go with the same size cooktop in our farmhouse. It's perfect for cooking for a crowd, and let's face it, when you live on a farm, cooking is the only option you have if you want to eat, so I know I'll be doing lots of it.

I'll leave you with a photo of my Grandma, known to Piper as "Mammaw" and she gets confused when I call her by any other name.


Right now, I'm in Corpus Christi (3 hours south of West Columbia) for a couple days visiting my maternal grandmother. I'll have photos of that tomorrow, hopefully.

what's in your attic?

While I was looking for this fair poster, and coveting it yet again, I stumbled across this blackboard:


And, of the limited antique/flea market shopping I've done, whadya know? I have this exact blackboard in my closet at home. I ran across it one day, probably while looking for some cool paper items for Studio Calico and I paid about $10 for it.

So, when I saw it at threepotatofour, for $150, I got really excited thinking what I had was worth something!

But before you knew it, I was checking out with the Fair Poster in my cart for $60, and thought, what an idiot I am because they probably paid $3 for it. Then I wasn't so excited.

sunset at the farm

Friday afternoon, it was 72 degrees and there was a cool breeze in the air.
Again, we were working on the farm until sunset, so when I saw this, I told Greg I couldn't wait to live at the farm, sit on the porch and be old.

I think I've inherited my grandfather's crankiness.

thou shalt not covet

Is it coveting if you just want something really badly and think it would look really really awesome in your farmhouse mainly because of the cute cow and know that it's likely never ever going to come around again?

Yay! my favorite kit ever is up for sale

Okay, well it's not exactly up for sale this second, but it will be in a few short hours. I even took a nap today to commemorate the occasion.

Seriously, I've loved working with the kit and I loved all of the 5 layouts I made with it, which is a record for me, to love each and every one.

Hope you like it as well.

CKC Nashville

I brought my camera and everything, but this was the only photo I took at CKC Nashville on Sept 11-12.

I was so glad to meet a fellow-SCer, Karen Malloy. I loved sitting and gabbing with her while I was waiting for the class. I learned so much about her wonderful family, including the fact that her son is a chef and I must have him cook for me sometime :)

The Masking and Misting class was fantastic. All the students were wonderful. We had a blast, and there were lots of giveaways. So, if you're on the fence about taking the same class at CKC-Glendale, jump off the fence and into the class. This time, Maggie Holmes is teaching it, so I know it will be even better.

Speaking of Maggie, I had the chance to eat dinner with her plus her mom, sister, neice, and my mom. We had a great time and the conversation was never lacking. Neither of our moms really understand the scrapbooking world, so it was funny hearing them talk about us. I only wish they lived closer and we could get together more often.

big bang

We were sitting in the apartment and we heard a loud bang.

Greg jumped up and looked out the back porch because it sounded like a neighbor had thrown something over the balcony in anger. But, there was nothing.

A fit of complaining ensued about how tired Greg is of living in the apartment and how glad he'll be to be away from all these loud neighbors.

About 20 minutes later he went to the fridge to grab a drink.


And, then, he felt stupid and apologized for his rant.

In his defense, the night before he had been woken up by a domestic dispute in the parking lot outside our window.

______________________________________________________________

Speaking of big bangs, we've just been introduced to Big Bang Theory. If you haven't seen it, it's hilarious. It reminds me of the nerd humor that kept me so entertained when I went to the Governor's Scholar program in high school one summer. I tried to say it wasn't 5 weeks of nerd camp, but there's no reason to lie to myself now. There was a whole different level of humor...lots of jokes based on science and math.

And, a new show that's on my radar that's equally as funny, Community. I watched the pilot episode 3 times...not by choice, but I wanted my mom and dad to see it, and I happened to be sitting in the room when they watched it at separate times. It has a good mix of characters and Ahbed (sp?) is hilarious.

My favorite line from the show:
Text: "Con-4-s8-tion on field"
"Who sent that text?"
"Someone with a misguided sense of abbreviation."

Ever got a text when you wondered why the person just didn't spell out the word because it would have used the exact same number of characters?

baby calf

Last week, our heifer became a cow.

Luckily she gave birth without a major issue, but there were several problems thereafter:

1. We realized it was premature.
2. The cow's udder hadn't dropped, so the calf couldn't get any nourishment.
3. By that point, it was too weak to even lift it's head.
4. He inherited his mother's bad hair.
   

Poor thing. Not only is he weak, but his hair sticks out in every direction.


After a day of tube-feeding, he was able to stand with some assistance and is learning to suck. Mostly, he chews on the bottle and gets milk that way.



So, tube-feeding is much faster and he's able to get the nourishment he needs.

After 3 days of this, he's able to stand up on his own and take a few steps. He's still very weak and when he can't stand any longer he falls into a pitiful pile on the ground.

We're having to treat him with antibiotics too, because he's got a slight infection.

But, isn't he just so cute?

Lorie thinks we may have to name him and keep him as a pet.

Oh, and one last thing. Did you know calves are born with teeth? A full set. It's very strange, actually.

boston

Overheard last night

Greg to my dad: Have you ever been to Boston?

Dad: Naw (that means "no" if you're in the south). That's one place I've never been. Been lots of places, but never there.

Greg: I almost went to school there.

Dad: Really?

Greg: Yeah, a school for boys.

(long pause)

Unruly boys.

Just so you know, this is the first I'd ever heard of Greg's potential education in Boston.