typical greg moment #584 - Lost Rolls of Stamps

I asked Greg to get a roll of stamps at the post office.

He came back with FOUR rolls around his fingers as rings.

Greg: I've got stamps!!!!

Me: FOUR ROLLS?!?! I only asked for one!!!

Greg: It's not like we won't use them.

At this point, I had done the math and figured out it was $176 in stamps. It goes against the very core of my being to spend more money on something than is necessary at the time. And, it goes against the core of my core to give more money to a government organization than is necessary at any time.

The next day, I had a few things to mail and I walked over to the stamp drawer to find this:



No stamps.

Not only were there no stamps, there was not even one roll of the four.

I immediately called Greg and asked him where the stamps were.

Greg: They're in the stamp drawer.

Me: No they're not.

Greg: Yes they are.

Me: Do you want me to send you a picture? Where did you put them?

Greg: Check your desk drawer


Me: Nope.

Greg: Check the container on my desk.

(no judging here. he absolutely loves his barn-door-on-sawhorses-rigged-desk.)

(but you can judge the Ironmind egg-shaped hand-exerciser thingie. I judge him constantly for that and it doesn't seem to bother him.)


Me: Nope not there either. I'll look around.

The following 23 minutes were spent turning the place upside down looking for the stamps.
I know it doesn't seem like a long time, but if you've ever fervently searched for something, you know 23 minutes is a long time.

Still there were no stamps to be found.

My envelopes would have to wait. I was not about to go buy another roll of stamps when I knew there were 4 somewhere.

That night, I pestered Greg until he went through all his pants pockets, and all his jacket pockets, and his backpack, and even his carhart vest pocket (his new favorite outerwear....he even tried to wear it to the movies the other night and I strongly prohibited it. Just because we have a farm doesn't mean we have to dress like it.)

Still no stamps.

The next day, I searched again. I searched high and low and even commissioned some help from Lorie.

Still no stamps.

I asked Greg to retrace his steps.

Me: Greg, you walked in and said, "I have stamps!!!!" Then I said, "FOUR ROLLS?!?!?! I only asked for one!!!" Then, what did you do next?

Greg: With me, there's no telling. (the understatement of the year)

Me: Greg, it's $200 in stamps (okay, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but not far off). Think please.

Greg: I can't.

Me: What do you mean you can't? You can't remember what you do each day? Just forget it.

Time passes that day and still no stamps.

Then, I walk upstairs and see this:


It may look like two baskets in a chair to you, but to me a beacon from heaven was shining upon it.

At that moment, I remembered the same day Greg bought the stamps, he went up to the house to get the baskets out so they wouldn't become dusty when the wood floors were sanded.


And they promptly went back to where they belonged.


And, the world was restored to order.